Saturday, June 12, 2010

7 weeks and counting...

This headline would be great if i were pregnant, really pregnant - not just "chemically" pregnant. Instead I am counting the weeks of my miscarriage. It appears I have a third curse aside from infertility and recurrent miscarriages - I have insanely long miscarriages. HCG quant from this week was at 450. This was down from 2700 two and a half weeks earlier. I have done tons of googling on this (of course) and haven't found any good reason why it could be taking so long (not even any bunk made up theories - i will cling to anything!)

I did have a revelation this week (pointed out by someone close to me a few months back) - nothing in life has ever been hard for me, so maybe this is my thing, this is my cross to bear?? And honestly, looking at it in the big picture and all of the other things that other people sometimes have to deal with: illness, loss of loved ones, infidelity of spouses, unemployment, etc, I really can't complain too long or loud. There are lots of ways to start a family, including the "a" word - can't bring myself to say it out loud yet, but it is always an option. My situation is something that can be overcome with other means. If I had to deal with some of those other strifes in life, I'd be out of luck, no magic fix it, would just have to cope. All in all, I am a lucky girl with a great family, wonderful husband and the world's greatest dog (seen sunbathing with his favorite duck here)!!

1 comment:

  1. Oh, hon, I'm sorry this is taking so long. I have also thought about whether this is my particular cross to bear. I have lost extended family members, and dealt with both parents having serious illnesses, but none of it has been as trying as my miscarriages. Big hugs to you!

    ReplyDelete